Filth-o-Matic

Let's invite a black cloud of filth into our house. No one knows where it came from, but it claims to have a written invitation. Every day, we'll choose whether to open a book or to open the Filth-o-Matic. This is an exclusive or because every book is a vertible magnet for filth.

Why settle for a device which you can easily operate with one hand when you can have an equivalent device which necessitates the use of both hands? Now, I realize that some people really enjoy dropping things on the floor just so they can pick them up again. So I'll speak on behalf of the minority rest of us who would like to reduce the number of objects in our lives. Less is more. Attach yourself directly to your graft.

"I don't like the dust." Well wear gloves. Be creative. Find something to put it in.

Not only are marker boards disgusting, they smell bad, and they are hard to erase. These factors are frequently overlooked by people who don't use them. But if you're not going to write anything anyway, why bother?